When we struggle with our self-esteem, it takes a lot for us to venture into unknown territory and seek a better relationship with ourselves. Stepping outside of our comfort zone and doing something radical can sometimes be more of a hindrance than a help – but there are a few things that you can try to remember when the going gets tough. In amongst all of the positive buzz-words and phrases, there are some golden titbits of positivity which can help you improve your self-confidence. Here are 7 Positive Affirmations to Live By…
“I am worthy”
This is one such phrase that has become something of a strapline in the body positive and self-care communities. Recycling such a phrase means that it can often lose its power and what it really stands for. To be worthy of something is to recognise your value in society as a human being – regardless of, in spite of and because of your body shape or size, the colour of your skin, your abilities, your health/mental health issues, your lifestyle choices and any other subjective and/or integral part of our character and behaviour. Whatever you’re about – you’re worthy of your own love.
“It’s okay to say no”
So many of us plan things and agree to things that we really don’t want to do. Many an anxiety attack can be brought on by the impending event/social gathering that we’ve agreed to on a whim without really thinking about how it will affect us. But know that it is okay to say no to a plan, it’s okay to drop out of something if you don’t feel up to it, and it’s more than okay to not feel guilty about it. You’ve got to stay true to how you’re feeling – don’t feel obliged to keep plans because you don’t want to be “that person”.
“I am valid”
We are born into a society which, unless you are thin, white, heterosexual and ‘accepted in the mainstream’, deems your experiences invalid. I call BS on that. Everyone has a story to tell and experiences to share which are valid – and that includes yours. Your life experiences have lessons within them, they have support and encouragement and they hold a great deal more validity than you think. Never be afraid to acknowledge your experiences as valid, who knows who will draw strength from them.
“I can create my own opportunities”
Life leads us to believe that only the rich and famous achieve their goals, and only the rich and famous receive unforgettable opportunities. Whether that’s a job, a relationship, a friendship, travel, life experiences, know that you can create your own opportunities. Many of us are taught that we aren’t good enough to succeed, even if we do put ourselves out there, but you can create your own opportunities, you just need to believe in yourself.
“My words, my voice”
This is truly a positive mantra to live by. We are censored, belittled and challenged every single day, but if you are speaking honestly, openly and without judgement, they are your words and you are using your voice. Give power to your voice by owning it, and don’t be afraid to speak up if you have an opinion on something.
“It’s okay to make mistakes”
We all fuck up. Every single one of us makes a tit of ourselves once in a while and we’ve all fallen foul to our own behaviour and actions. But instead of chastising ourselves for screwing up, know that it’s okay to make mistakes! We’re only human, and as long as you haven’t hurt yourself or anyone else, you can put money on the fact that your mistake will be like a drop in the ocean in a few days, weeks or months’ time. Don’t be too hard on yourself.
“I am growing and learning”
You’re never going to know everything. Life is a constant cycle of growing, learning and adapting. As long as you remember that you are always on a journey, you won’t feel that you are pressuring yourself to move faster than you feel able or ready to. Take your time, life is a learning curve.